This morning while in the shower, I determined I would take control of the day and make every minute count. Of course, in most characteristic fashion, I immediately regretted my bold and aggressive declaration of ambition. Who am I, I challenged myself as someone who could barely make themselves get out of bed in the morning, to force my will upon something so small and innocuous as a minute? Who or what would I target next? A second? A millisecond? Once upon the slippery slope of blind ambition, where would my efforts end? Would I ever be satisfied with the time made available to me or would I eventually drive myself to insanity in my quest to bend the entirety of the universe to my bidding?
As a staunch believer in free will and self responsibility, how could I justify enforcing my own wants and needs, however well intentioned, onto something that had no choice but to march steadily from one beat to the next, eternally passing the figurative baton of historic tapestry from one indistinguishable instance of itself to the next? And what if it can't even count? This construct of a metaphysical concept conceived by man for the arguably express purpose of torturing ourselves through the antagonistic inference of stolen personal entitlement caused by traffic congestion and endless Starbuck lineups. Had we not already asked so much of so little? Could I now demand that it also cater to my individual, selfish whims. Logic would dictate that as each minute is a singular entity, born and extinguished almost simultaneously, its grasp of numerical concepts would be limited to a single digit. One. No more, no less. To expect its knowledge to reach beyond its grasp seems as fair as passing judgement on a stone because it lacks the ability to soar through the air like an eagle.
So I have decided instead to commit to a different tact today, and take each minute as it comes. Accepting it for what it is and not what I will it to be. It is not lost on me that I will still be exerting a form of control by taking without asking, but this time I will do my best to offset such hubris by offering something in return. Today I will do my best to give a shit.
A little creative give and take shall a Thursday make and before I know it, Friday will swing its way back around. I feel much less like a bully when dealing with days, especially when I know when it comes to being difficult, they generally started it first.
A song 3 minutes and 23 seconds long: Simply Red "If You Don't Know Me By Now".