During my walk this morning, I encountered a girl about eight or nine years of age (or perhaps older) who was doing her best to load her arms with more items than she could carry. I stopped and asked how far she had to go, intending to volunteer my support. She pointed to a truck across the street but before I could say anything else, a woman a little farther up the sidewalk who I hadn't spotted previously, said the girl was OK and could take two trips if needed. I got the distinct vibe that I was being viewed as a potential predator. I respect and even applaud the woman (I am assuming her mother) for stepping in, but is it OK if I still felt a little creepy and sad that we live in a world where I have to be careful who I offer to help? Don't get me wrong, I understand it. I'm just disappointed by it.
Two concepts mentally called into question during my walk...
Friday is "Too bad, get your ass out for a walk," day. Anyone know if you can still get those little heat pouches we would stuff in our boots and mitts? I figure with an extra hour prep time, some duct tape, and a few hundred pouches, I might be able to extend my outdoor excursions for at least another week or two, until I completely succumb to my nemesis, the damnable cold.
Tune to freeze by: The Beatles "Drive My Car".
Have you ever found yourself saying to someone "You know, if I knew how to do that, I would totally do it for you," and then immediately after, in your head, think "remember to never learn how to do that"?
Good morning Thursday.
I realize we both have to be here today but let's try and keep to ourselves as much as possible. It's a small world, I know, but I am confident with a little effort we can each find our own space and give the other some breathing room. Don't bother looking for me because I will be hiding and I am really, really good at it. Like scary good. All my friends say so. So you stay over there, I'll stay over here, and we'll just wait for Friday to show up. I'm glad we can communicate and behave like adults about this.
Today's song for a separated room: The J. Geils Band "Centerfold".
I have decided, when I wake up excited about being half way through the work week and prepared to tackle the day, I am going to refer to it as being "Humped and Pumped". It only seems natural.
Wednesday decided to take my challenge and deliver me a less than satisfying morning. Disappointing enough that it has forced me out into the cold and intermittent rain for a walk, coffee, and donut. All I know is that it better smarten up or I'll - well I guess I won't do anything. I know it's a day and not a person. I'm frustrated, not stupid. Or at least not THAT stupid.
I've been getting depressed due to all the news I see about one bad thing happening after another in the world. Then I read that Blake Shelton has been voted the Sexiest Man Alive this year and the news is even trending above the latest mass shooting in Tehama County, California. It warms my heart to see humanity staying true to its priorities. Thank goodness for the little nuggets of positivity that bring sunshine into my day.
OK Wednesday, what'cha got?
And it better not be the cooties. I saw a bad case of those back in grade five and no one wants to live through that twice. Lost a lot of good kids that year. Well, maybe not "good" kids but most of them were at least tolerable. I can almost remember some of their names.
Other than that, bring it on.
Ditty for the day: Dolly Parton "Nine to Five".
Meant to go out for an hour last night after being cooped up in the house for a couple days, doing a lot of work. Lucky (or unlucky, depending on whether you measure by the night before or the morning after), I met some fine sea (lake?) faring gentlemen who were more than happy to share their time ashore with song and drink. Beer and Tequila are not part of my standard Monday routine, and I can't say I'll make it an ongoing tradition, but it turns out when other people are buying the rounds, any day can be treated like a Friday night. Unfortunately it doesn't turn the next day into Saturday, but time and Tuesday wait for no man (or any other unspecified gender I suppose) so it's off to work I go.
Tune for a Tuesday: David Bowie "Let's Dance".
Spent twenty minutes like this at the gym waiting for someone to come and ask me what I was doing. I finally had to leave, but I figure I'll make up for it next time by coming in earlier and taking my pants off first. Sometimes it pays to kick things up a notch.
Sunday morning and the temperature has dropped back down to zero but I was up at eight, showered and dressed, and here I am, already outside and on the move. A big change from yesterday morning. On the outside, at least, but this is the first step to changing the inside. It may not make a difference but at least I know I will feel better that I tried. That I didn't just roll over and go back to sleep. That I didn't choose to hide. If depression wants me today, it can come and find me. I don't see why I should be the only one doing all the work.
P.S.: I finally figured out how to put on my scarf properly but as I have it wrapped around a hoodie and I'm still wearing my motorcycle jacket, I fear whatever I might have gained in intellectual progress, I have sorely lost in fashion acumen. I still have to work on that whole "hat" thing.
Sunday sing-along: Otis Redding "Hard To Handle".
I think we should be much more appreciative of our ears. Not only do they enable us to communicate more effectively, give us something to adorn, and something to hold onto when things get a little heated (nudge, nudge, wink, wink), they also save us from having to staple our glasses in place.
Very late start today. I find when I sleep in I am more vulnerable to the negative thoughts and emotions that can plague me so I try to make sure I get up first thing, even when it's hard. This morning I slipped and sure enough, Depression came to visit with its brothers Hopelessness and Worthlessness in tow. At first I was prepared to just give in but then I decided I didn't want to waste another day. So I said "fuck you," threw on some 80's music, grabbed a shower, got dressed, and got my ass out into the sunshine. Some days, all it takes is a pair of red Converse and a red cup of coffee and you're back on top.
Music to get moving: Clarence Carter "Stroke It".
The kettle I use to make my coffee is manufactured by Betty Crocker. I keep trying to get it to make me cupcakes but it's stuck on the hot water setting. I figure more coffee will help me figure it out.
According to Bon Jovi, someone has been giving love a bad name. My hope is it isn't a name like "Ignatius Thunderbottom". Enough people have difficulty telling others they love them and this sort of thing will kill any hopes of getting them over that hurdle. Not to mention how difficult it's going to be signing those little cards you send with a bouquet of flowers. I think that person is being very selfish, making everything much harder on the rest of us, simply because they have a grudge against a simple four letter word.
It's been great chatting with you. Be sure to give my Ignatius Thunderbottom to your mother for me when you see her.
Today I've got a little bounce in my step, a little pep in my stride, a little go-out-and-get, and nothing to hide. There's also a little tear in my underwear but let's agree to focus on the positive, OK?
Bed at 4:30am and up again at 7am is not a good way to begin a Friday. Granted, it's not a good way to begin any day but as this day is Friday, I'm going to to keep things current. I don't think my brain can handle anything more than that right now. Still, work has to get done and deadlines have to be met, so with the promise of some sun and warmer weather today, I'm making sure I have plenty of time to squeeze in a walk. I'll probably still end up with a keyboard imprint on my face and drool on my mousepad before the day is out but things could be worse. My job could involve feeding an industrial grade wood chipper. I bet those guys make sure they get plenty of sleep.
Today's melody for the barely upright: Otis Redding "I've Got Dreams To Remember".
Oddly enough, sometimes when I begin to feel depressed, I find that telling other people how much I appreciate them and how important they are for being who they are, makes me feel better. I am going to try and get around town a little later and do that. Some of you have already had such interactions with me and I want you to know I was sincere when I shared my sentiments, and they have not changed. My favourites though are those people I don't know. The ones who contribute to society and, although they may get paid to do their "job", they are often not the jobs that most of us would do. The people who volunteer, the ones who clean up after us, the ones who work to make our community a better place. Perhaps acknowledging that these people matter helps me believe that others think of me the same way at times but I'm not aware of it. It could be wishful thinking on my part but there are times when I feel I need something to hold on to, and if a wish is the best I can get, I'll take it. Here's to you and how awesome you are.
Song for a Thursday: The Temptations "Just My Imagination".