The creative endeavours of a human being in progress.
Sometimes I have thoughts.
Sometimes I post these thoughts on my website for you to read. Sometimes you read them. This is generally referred to as "Blogging", which should not be confused with "Flogging", an activity I do not perform for free. Unlike my Blogging.
At my age, I feel I may be on the cusp of being considered charming. Until then, depending on who I'm talking to, I am either old enough to come across as creepy or young enough to seem overeager. This is why I tend to rely on the classic 'high five' in most situations. As awkward as it may be, as long as they don't leave me hanging, I drop that one into the 'win' column and walk on.
I'm considering bringing back sweatbands for the head and wrists. That would be my thing—Sweatband Guy. I realize I might be going out on a limb here but I already know it's better than my last effort—Diaper Head Guy. You think it would be easier to breathe through those things
Remember, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. That, and those cats who squish themselves flat up against the wall so they can stare at you from around the edge of doorways. Those things can really creep you out.
When the movie Breakfast Club came out, I compared myself to a cross between Anthony Michael Hall and Judd Nelson. Now I envision a bit of Anthony Michael Hall with a good dose of Ally Sheedy (minus the dandruff) and I am strangely OK with that.
Taking a nature walk today and a strange man stepped out of the bushes on the trail in front of me. Either he is the world's worst ninja or he was taking a pee. I didn't see a sword or any throwing stars so I am leaning towards the latter. If no one hears from me again, he may have proved me wrong.
Depression, instead of giving me a break for any length of time, chose instead to be an obnoxious guest, crashing on my couch and putting the empty box of Froot Loops back in the cupboard without telling me before I went grocery shopping.
This essay was published on The Mighty on September 25, 2017.